August 16, 2010

Back to School 2010

I am feeling the end of summer coming and it has me a bit down.  Just when you get into a lazy sleeping-in, no-set-schedule groove, it's time to shop for school supplies.   I don't know about you but when I get to the store and find all the school supply shoppers have already raided the bins of all the glue sticks and packages of 16 count crayons, I get a bit nervous.  I mean we still have a couple weeks left, but here I was stuck trying to decide if I would have to buy the extra large glue sticks (x10) or hop over to another Target in the area.  Don't even get me started on the lack of folder choices.  My 16 and 13 year old boys were almost forced to go to high school with Bratz folders.  And why is it such a big deal to the school if I buy 2 packs of 24 count  Crayola crayons instead of the 16 packs they 'requested?'  It said right there in black and white: '16 packs only.'  Are they afraid of some kind of riot breaking out amongst the second graders if my daughter is the only one with 3 shades of green in her pack?  Must we all be totally equal in our color selections?

Living in the East has some disadvantages.  One of those disadvantages is that PC rules and sometimes, it's just plain silly.  For instance I was once told that for the 'Fall Festival' parade there should be no witch costumes for fear of offending any of the real practicing witches.  As if a cute little girl in a pointy hat is upsetting to someone out there.  Seems more like an homage than a slap in the face.  Am I right?  Or is someone going to twitch their nose and cast a spell on me?  Also, there may be Hanukkah songs at the 'Winter Muscial' but any mention of a Christ child and you will be banned to outer PC darkness.  Everything is political here so I assume the 16 count only crayon decision is also somehow related.

But back to my feelings while looking into all the emptied bins at Target.  It wasn't unlike the first day of school itself.  I felt a bit panicky.  I felt a bit behind on the things I should have been on top of.  I felt overwhelmed, distressed, and cranky.  All the feelings of going back to school itself.  I half expected to look down and find that I was standing there in my underwear.  But I knew that wasn't the case.  Thank goodness!  Somehow I managed to pull it together and shop for half the things they did have in stock.  I picked up the correct items later at Safeway.  I should have known to shop at the less obvious place originally.  You have to be tricky sometimes when you live in densely populated areas.  It's like survival of the best shopper!  I was told in confidence that when firewood is out at Home Depot the best place to search is Seven Eleven.  If you are a local and reading this, please keep that on the down low.

So I guess this year for my back-to-school theme dinner with my children all dressed in overly pressed button down white shirts, (and gay floral dresses on the girls), we will have a theme of political correctness with a splash of where to shop info printed out on crepe paper hanging ornately from my chandelier.  Happy Back to School to you and yours!

5 comments:

Teachinfourth said...

I was always jealous of the other second graders who had the Crayola set with the sharpener built right into the box.

That was just the beginning of the social classes…

No witch costumes? Did they also outlaw the movie, "Hocus Pocus?"

Heathenism.

CB said...

Let me tell you I live in Idaho and the PC stuff around here is out of control too. Basically about 5 years ago they outlawed Halloween in my kid's elementary school altogether. There used to be an annual costume parade around the school followed by a fun party. They chucked it all.
In fact, they have chucked parties. And as of last year we cannot even bring treats in for birthdays. Crazy!

My kids don't start school for another 2 weeks and last week I took them school shopping at Target. I totally feel your pain as all the boxes of 24 ct. crayons were gone and there were NO pencils...seriously??? Who are these mom's who get there so early - ha ha!
It is definately a crazy time of year and I too am mouring the loss of summer. I work for the school district and love having the summer off. I go back to work next week - Ughh!

Dawn Parsons Smith said...

You completely crack me up! I just went through this yesterday! Most schools start in early August here in Tucson. Some schools start July 23!!

The witch costume thing...oh my heavens...I'm such a rebel that I would definitely dress up as a witch!

designHER Momma said...

ha! My daughter just started Kindergarten this week and the supply list is completely out of control!

literaqueen said...

You have a back to school dinner?

I'm driving to DC and buying all the firewood at 7-11 now. Thanks for the tip.