August 26, 2011

Misc. Letters

Dear 'I Can't Believe it's Not Butter' I beg to differ.  I totally believe you are not butter.  I believe it with all my taste buds.  When my husband is sent to shop for groceries he always buys you claiming that you spread better.  I see his point but would like to say that I think taste should rate higher than spread ability.  The fact that you take so long to melt into my toast makes me suspicious of you.  I would rather die of heart disease (sudden, over) from butter, than from cancer (long, slow) due to whatever plastic-type ingredients that are in imitation butter spread.  So thanks, but no thanks on the ICBINB.

Dear Hurricane Irene, you have spoiled our end of summer vacation plans.  I am okay with our alternate plans and just hope to see my house standing (and not standing in a puddle of water) when I get back.  Thank goodness we recently paid the outstanding 10.00 somehow left unpaid on our flood insurance.   Earthquakes, hurricanes, what's next?  Maybe I shouldn't be asking this.  Please pray for my dog who we did not bring with us.

Dear Parents, thank you for thoughtfully calling me within minutes after the 5.9 earthquake hit our area.  That was nice to hear from someone.  We were just fine hanging out for 45 seconds under our dining room table.  Our funny neighbors confused earthquake with tornado and ran to their basement.  What I didn't appreciate was the crack made about Mother Nature not liking our president and trying to strike back.  I would have thought if anyone needed a spanking by Mother Nature it would have been members of congress or possibly the Tea Party wackos.  I guess we are all entitled to our own opinions- just keep them to yourself.

Dear Family Members, please stop fighting with each other on our vacation.  You are giving me a headache.

Dear Big Boy,  I hope you can get your non-fiction first-person summer reading assignment finished and your essay written before school starts on Monday.  Procrastination is a bummer in the end.  I speak from experience.

Dear Readers, I am sorry for not blogging so much lately.  Not sure if you care really but in addition to not blogging I also have not been reading or commenting and we all like it when we get comments... so sorry.  I am probably not deserving of your kind comments, but leave them anyways if your so inclined.  If not- I totally get it!




CSIowa said...

Dear Kelly,

Smart Balance is supposedly good for you (i.e. not plastic) and spreads quite nicely. We know it isn't butter, but it tastes at least as good as any other not-butter thing in a tub. We also have butter.

Hurricane Irene sent my daughter home from NC a day early. I'm glad she made it safely. Good luck with your house!

I don't have anything to say about anything else at the moment. Try to have some fun on your vacation. Did you bring Tylenol? Earplugs?

Eileen said...

I hope Irene passes you by! We also shun ICBINB!

Tracy P. said...

Niki didn't start her THREE summer reading and essay projects until when we got home on Wednesday...sigh.