September 15, 2012

The Eagle has Landed

No my title has nothing to do with the president touching ground in Air Force One.  In fact I intend to avoid everything political on this blog because I am so friggin' sick of politics at this point I could puke.    Instead my title refers to my eagle scout son who recently had his night in the sun (except being at night you could technically say his night in the moonlight) at his eagle court of honor and then we swiftly took him off to college where he landed safely in his apartment and then pretty much told us to scoot.

Big Boy's court of honor should really have happened like a month before but we like to procrastinate around here I guess.  Trying to get all that done just before leaving was a note I will make to myself not to repeat with boy's 2 and 3.  He didn't really want the court of honor, but I felt it was something good to do for the younger boys in the troop to look up to.  We had a nifty cub scout display and I made an effort to invite those families with cub scout aged boys.  We got many positive remarks, especially over the white chocolate dipped Oreos with the trefoil scout emblems on them (60 was not enough)... Anyways I will spare you any more of the details but would like to say that I wish we could have had more involvement from the Eagle himself when planning this.  Not wanting it done he simply told me that I could do whatever and not to involve him.  When he started hearing whisperings about a slide show he sat me down for a talk.  He wanted to know what songs I'd chosen, what kind of photos were in there, etc.  Suddenly he was super interested.  I should have just sat him down and showed it to him but I feared that he would over-ride too much if it and make me have to start from scratch.  Instead he saw a glimpse of it while we were setting it up and had his melt down right then and there 10 min before we were to start the event.  Nice.  Troy somehow pulled off a miracle and replaced the 3-4 slides that most upset him ("I have a cold sore in that one!"  "I'm pulling a stupid face there!"), without messing up the timing too much.  I'm sorry, but if you want a photo of Big Boy where he's NOT pulling a silly face then you will be looking through a lot of silly faced photos to find a normal one.  I dare you to try and put together a slide show of BB without the silly showing through.  Not possible.  Here is one slide he didn't mind.  A Big Boy cartoon character drawn by his cousin....  

Awesome no?  Thanks Jarom!

So 4 days later we were on a plane to SLC and then a short visit with T's parents there before our 3.5hr drive to Rexburg.  On our way we stopped at a thrift store, a dollar store and a Walmart outside of town where it wouldn't be so crowded. We were like sleepy zombies walking down the isles trying to figure out what he would need.  We stopped when the rental car would hold no more.  We checked into the hotel and as BB was brushing his teeth he actually asked me, in all seriousness, if I could send him new toothbrushes when he texted me.  I logically answered that it would take several days for a toothbrush to get to him.  He graciously told me he could give me a few day's notice before his current toothbrush needed replacing.  I worried that this request meant he was not really ready for the real world.  And also that there was no time like the present for him to be pushed out of the nest.

By the time we left him we were ready to go and he was ready for us to go.  His manners where not the best and T and I were pretty upset as we drove back to Salt Lake.  This sense of entitlement and ingratitude made us feel like failures as parents.  It made saying good-bye fairly easy though I must say.  Then we had a bit of an ah ha moment on our long drive back.  He is a good kid.  He's making good choices.  He is where he needs to be.  He isn't perfect but neither are we.  We thought of some kids we know who are in much worse places right now than our son, and suddenly thought that perhaps we were the ungrateful ones.

On the ride to the airport I started thinking about my boy.  He must be getting ready for church.  Who would be waking him?  Would he find his cufflinks?  He might not find the iron, or matching socks.  Suddenly the tears started coming.  I'd been so strong up to this point.  Walking onto the plane- another mystery melt down.  I don't even know what I was thinking about at that point to bring it on.  The other passengers must have thought I was completely nuts.

At home without him there is an invisible hole where he used to be, and way too many cheese sticks in the fridge.  Being the oldest child, he had the tendency to always make his presence known.  It's quiet even though there are 4 kids left.  Weird.  I think it's going to be okay though.  Sniff.


Eileen said...

Wow! His cousin did an amazing job on the drawing! And I'm wishing we DID have a court of honor because my son didn't quite make it to eagle.....despite the fact that he did the project!! It finally came down to me refusing to do anything more and him saying he felt satisfied with where he was at.

He sent us a text last night showing a picture of his dinner. It was rice (not even Minute Rice!) with a can of Hungry Man beef stew on top. Personally, I wanted to puke, but he was clearly proud of it and said "not too shabby".

Our boys will be fine. I think.

Melinda said...

I've heard the theory that nature requires the "baby bird" makes himself into a total pill so that the momma bird actually feels like pushing him out of the nest! Also, it's not unusual for the leaving nestling to be kind of a jerk since he can't manage to say that he might actually miss you.

It's hard for them to leave.

mCat said...

He's doing the right thing at the right time. Sounds like on point to me! Congrats on the first one gets easier, I promise

Erica said...

You are so cute Kelly! I can't imagine what you are feeling. Such a mix of emotions. You are a great mother!

Chris & Steph said...

Give it a month,...then look again. You might find that your other kids expand to fill the void. Strange but true!

Chris & Steph said...

Give it a month,... then look again. The others manage to "expand" to fill the "void". Chris and I spend a good deal of time trying to figure out exactly what each of our younger ones will "contribute to the cause."