Home

It is early in the morning here in Gaithersburg Maryland, and although I should be exhausted I have too much on the brain to sleep. Troy and I have spent the last two days searching for homes in the Maryland area. It's been an eye-opening experience to see the condition and asking price of some of these homes (cockroaches, knee-high grass, food sitting out, all for the bargain price of 550k come on down and buy!). Also the journey of choosing for me is difficult. Placing value on what you think is important and going against the natural man instinct to want the nicest possible looking home without spending too much money. I am someone who likes things to be nice. I care what things look like and enjoy surroundings that are tasteful and efficient. I am also craving a large outdoor space for the kids to play, since I like to remain sane. We saw a ton of stinkers in the last 2 days and it's depressing. The one home that is so nicely updated is simply too small for our needs though. We are deciding between digging deeper into our savings and not being able to pay cash for a car for Troy, or downsizing our housing expectations.... what to do, what to do. I want to be realistic, I want to have more cash on hand to play with, I want to seem unpretentious, but then there's that other side. The esthetic side, who wants the home from the magazine with the perfect yard where everyone must be happy who lives inside there. The real question here is where do you find happiness? In a home or from within. For me it's a bit of both I guess. But I do know, because my mama told me. That true happiness lies within. We'll see what walls we come up with to house all that happiness. I hope God will bless us. He always has.

The Art of Under-Mothering

So the process of parenting for me can at times be so overwhelming that I want to throw in the towell. My latest challenge is getting along with my teenager and getting him up in the morning for school without fireworks. I must really be doing something wrong because today he threw rice crispys all over the place. I think even he was surprized at his over-reaction. He has lost his beloved ipod for a week and will be weeding the side of the house this afternoon. (too much detail?)

Sometimes, just sometimes though. I think I see the light. Like yesterday when it was Big Girl's school feild trip to the ice-skating rink. This field trip is a long standing tradition at the pre-school. One that I thought rather silly when my 14 and 11 year old kids went there 10 years ago. I thought "these kids can't skate, they are way to scared and clingy, what a hassle!" I hovered and overdid my attention to the situation, and got exactly wht I expected. Overly clingy, non-skating children. This year however, with Big Girl. I casually mentioned the field trip and told her what a lucky girl she was for getting to go. She repeatedly said to everyone who would listen "tomorrow's my lucky day!" We had maybe 1-2 conversations about falling and getting back up and learning each time you fell, etc. I didn't drive, and I didn't skate up. I showed up late when she had already gotten outfitted and watched as someone else held her hand and skated with her. As the scared clingy children held on tightly to thier parents' legs out on the ice, I commented to Ki Ki (my favorite pre-school teacher), that "this really is a feild trip all about bravery isn't it?" And her reply was even more insightful. She said "yes- and even more, it's about seeing if the parents can let go enough to let thier kids grow." By the end of the hour Big Girl was skating (or at least marching around on the ice) without anyone or any red cone to hold on to. She even unlaced and took off her own skates. One of the only children to do so that I noticed. Pretty cool. Ki Ki said I passed : )

Touched for Mother's Day

Well I never would have predicted this, but for mother's day this year my 3 sons (and Troy), pooled their cash together to get me an Ipod touch. This is all fine and dandy, but I don't think I really appreciate all the technical things it can do. I barely use the ipod I currently have (which has now been passed to Drew BTW, his died in the washer). Since they have had their paws all over it all day (even snatching it when I am not looking), I am beginning to see the light. I asked Troy if I could get him some home furnishings for father's day in another month... He thought that was pretty funny.

To their credit they also got me fine chocolates, and an audio book I had been wanting. Plus my sweet husband hand squeezed fresh OJ for me for breakfast. I feel so blessed to be a mother. Happy Mother's Day to everyone!

Good Sportsman

Okay so this looks kinda bad, I know. But I just love this picture of Drew after winning the pine-wood derby last night. Really, he didn't rub it in anyone's face (although he won by a long shot in all 3 of his races). In fact (when prompted by mom) he told the 2nd place winner "good race." But this photo sure does show the way mom was feeling at the moment. It's shameful the way I get into it. Troy has all the skills and I am the wind beneath his wings I guess you could say. It really was a bit of an unfair advantage since Drew is our 3rd boy and most of these parents were there for the first or 2nd time. We are oldies in our ward. I had to smile when our 14 year old son's boy scout leader showed up with his wolf-aged son and their 1st car and asked "what's up with the weighing in? Does it have to be a certain weight or something?" (Oh my!) It was very sportsmanlike of me to explain the rules to him and offer the coins from my purse to make his son's car weigh the right amount. It wasn't very sportsmanlike of me to internally laugh at him since he is sometimes a bit of a jerk to my son at boy scouts. He is often less than informative with the parents so I found it very ironic when he complained about the lack of information coming home about the derby. I just nodded sympathetically and said "yes that is frustrating isn't it?"

Oh Yeah, 16 years has past...

So I fear I neglected to mention that Troy and I had an anniversary. We have officially been married for 16 years. I'm afraid our actual anniversary gets buried in birthday celebrations since on our 7th anniversary one year I gave him a son. But we managed to get away for a nice dinner. What an important decision it was for me to marry the right man at the right time in the right place. They have been 16 great years! Thanks sweetie.