July 06, 2010

East vs West

So now that our family has made it's decision about parting ways with Uncle Sam the next big decision will be where to find our next job.  T I think has his heart set on going back to Iowa where we did medical school and a fellowship.  As much as I love the people in Iowa the weather makes me uneasy to say the least.  I like four seasons as much as the next person. I just think that when three quarters of the year are miserable due to heat and humidity, frigid temps making it impossible to venture outside, or tornadoes blowing you over, that it kinda ruins most of your year, ya know?  Call me a big baby I don't care.  No amount of niceness or job friendliness for T can balance out an angry mother nature.  Need I remind you that the last time we lived there the flooding covered an entire city?  Lets not risk Iowa again please.  Sorry to my Iowa friends- hang in there, maybe you'll be rewarded in heaven.

So staying in the East is an option but here are my concerns: My kids will grow up and want to date people and there are just not that many LDS options to choose from.  I know, that is what college is supposed to be for and we can just cart them off to Utah right?  Well, there are no guarantees that my boys will get in to BYU (Provo at least) Big Boy's grades were not as good as they could have been during his sophomore year.  I hate to be the bad guy when pointing this sad fact out to him, but he may have just thrown BYU Provo out the window this year.  We shall see... I worry about my Middle Boy attracting the wrong kind of girl out here.  I know this may seem narrow-minded.  There are wrong kinds of kids everywhere.  I just want more of the right kinds for them to choose from and Utah may have a bigger box of chocolates (even though you never know what you're gonna get).

Utah also has cousins, grandparents, and mountains!  Yeah!  Being there for the funeral has me all pro-Utah.  I have even been looking online at houses there.  But there will be draw backs too.  I will miss the diversity.  I tried explaining this to my Dad on the phone today and he got all defensive saying that growing up without diversity turns out some pretty fine kids too.  Yes, I am sure they turn out fine but when they grow up and move away and they have to order fries at McDonalds in East LA some day they will feel like they are about to be pick-pocketed at any second, and the nervousness will be detected by the McDonald's workers, making for a possible spitting-in-their food situation.  Also, understanding the accent when they repeat back the order may prove tricky.  I just want to give my kids more opportunities in life.  You know what I mean by this?  I don't want the black wise man in the nativity freaking them out as children. (This actually was my personal experience, not one I am proud of).  I want open minded kids who will accept and feel comfortable around all types of people.


I hate it when people criticize Utah.  I love Utah, but Utah has some problems y'all.  Sometimes the people can be narrow minded and too much like TAMN.  I ran into a couple TAMNs in church at my parents ward.  It was nauseating.  With their little girls dressed in big poofed out skirts and ginormous flowers in their heads.  I hated that I was judging them until they were snotty to me and then I proceeded to judge.  I am sure Utah will provide me with many such situations.  Situations I am willing to put up with in order to be closer to family.  I feel like I am being a bit snotty myself thinking that after years of living outside of Utah that I know a thing or two that I could teach.  But really what living away has done for me is it has given me the gift of open mindedness, of not being too quick to judge a book by it's cover.  Something Utah could use a spoonful of sometimes.  I liked what my husband said (well I liked it at first before it sunk in and started to bug me) he said moving back to Utah would be like going from a plate of delicious spicy food to an unseasoned potato.... unbaked.  You can now leave mean comments for my husband for that remark :)

18 comments:

Teachinfourth said...

What? And in just what other state can you find Cafe Rio? If THAT isn't seasoned food, then I don't know what it…

You have a dilemma. I wish you the best of luck in making it. Make the list…pros and cons and then I would recommend going from there.

Cheeseboy said...

Honestly, you don't want your kids going to that crud school BYU.

Here is my suggestion, move to Utah and send them to UTAH!!! (Go Utes!)

Seriously though, there are other schools in Utah besides that school down south. They all have good institutes with tons of great members. I loved going to Utah because I got to make friends with both members and non-members alike and there were plenty of BOTH of them there. My wife is a Utah alum.

Chaka said...

I hope my kids are not close minded and judgemental for growing up in such a sheltered environment, but I also kind of like the plain baked potato taste. My biggest pet peeve with Utah is the silent T accent. We may have nice mountains, but few Utahns can pronounce the word. (Mow-uns.)
Good luck with deciding where to go.

Carrie Stuart said...

Oh, I could write a book on this topic. I won't. I'll just summarize my thoughts by saying after moving to Utah from California as a teenager, and experiencing being LDS in both places, I would not choose to raise my children in Utah...and I'm entitled to that very opinionated opinion, thank you very much. We do LOVE (to visit) Utah, though. Especially for conference. =^)

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Shana said...

There are snotty people everywhere-no matter what the religion or where they live.

You know, and this will sound really bad, but when I think of Utah, I think of men with more than one wife. Is that bad of me? Where did I get this thought from? I don't know. I have never been to Utah. I guess I watch too much TV.
You can erase this comment if it affends you.
Would you not want your kids to marry non-LDS people? And what would you do if they did? Or wouldn't they, if you said no?
Just curious, is all.
I always want to learn about stuff--so that is why I am asking!!

superpaige said...

As one who loves Utah, lives in Utah, and loves it, I will try to not be offended by your husband's comment.

Kelly said...

Hey Shana
perhaps you think that because at one point in the early days of our church they did practice polygamy. It was dropped many years ago though in 1890.

I would hope that my kids would choose LDS partners to marry. One can only marry for eternity in the temple to another LDS person who is worthy. It wouldn't be the end of the world for me if my children married outside the church but it's something that is pretty important.

Your question isn't offensive at all. Don't believe everything on TV though : ) Many of my non LDS friends in college didn't think we danced either until I showed them by winning a dance contest! The prize didn't help much since it was coupon for a free beer at a local bar!

Kelly said...

Sorry SuperPaige. He did grow up in SLC so he should know better. I love Utah too and one of my pet peeves when I lived there is how people always complained about it. Now that I have lived outside I see both sides. Most of the people are great and the outdoors are fantastic, there are some stereo-types out there though...

Eileen said...

I think Washington has all that you're looking for! It's WEST. It has mountains. It has EAGLES soaring! It's got whales, for goodness sake! It's diverse. It has enough Mormons that your kids don't feel like outcasts, but they also won't feel like one little cow in a great big herd.

WASHINGTON. If I had you on the phone right now, I'd sing you the state song.

Kelly said...

You are like a walking advertisement for Washington Eileen : )

Tracy P. said...

Pennsylvania is nice ;-)

Shana said...

I used to watch Big Love so maybe that is where I got the idea!

I have been to a lot of places in the US and lived in a few too and there is good and bad about everywhere, from weather to people to religion, to jobs, to community to everything. I guess you just have to first decide what is important .... then look for a place that suits.
Or pull out a map, close your eyes and pick!!!!!!!!
Winning a dance contest is great--even if you couldn't use the prize!!!
And to be honest, I have never personally met (that I know of) a LDS person. Not many around where I live.
Thanks for not being offended!!!!

literaqueen said...

Oh, you just got bad luck with the Iowa flooding thing . . . man, I'd move back to Iowa in a heartbeat!

Maybe you'll have more options with T's career, but my experience has been that if I try to go somewhere that God doesn't have in mind for me to go, no matter how hard I try a job doesn't open up. So since I WANT to live in Utah (which I said I'd never ever want to do at one point), I keep ending up further east.

'Tis the season for personal revelation . . .