June 08, 2010

Being Fair

As a parent of multiple kids, one is always put into tricky situations. Situations where you are accused of being unfair. It is next to impossible to be fair at all times. Each kid is unique and each requires different treatment. Someone may need a new pair of shoes right now and another may have to wait while watching their brother with the new shoes strutting around like a peacock.

I have tried to teach my kids that we have to wait for things we may want until we actually have a need. But I also hear that voice in my head while I am shopping saying "for the sake of peace, love and all that is holy at home couldn't you think of a little something each kid needs today?" Sometimes I give in to the voice. Sometimes no. The other day I came home from Target with new summer PJ's for Baby Girl. She's been sweating her heart out at night in her flannels lately. Then I bought each boy in the family a new swimming suit. They each had that need as well. Nothing for Big Girl this time. I actually looked for a bracelet-making kit like one she used to have that brought her hours of joy but couldn't find it there. So nothing for Big Girl.

Even after explaining to her the situation, she still looked pouty. I decided not to pay attention to that kind of behavior. Even when she told me how sweaty she was in her PJs at evening prayer. I told her to go and get one of her Big T-shirts to sleep in. "They aren't real pajamas" she told me. "They are real to me, go and get them on if you are hot." was my reply. Then at bedtime I saw a note on my pillow. It read "Dear Mom, I am a member of this family too! Love A.T." And as a member of this family I hope she will get that simply writing me hate mail will not get her a new pair of summer pajamas. For at least a week or two anyways : )

From these photos it seems someone clearly has the better set of glasses!
I should really point this out to her don't you think?


Carrie Stuart said...

Our favorite "fair" comeback lately (although I think it might only work since we have only big kids) is "If life was fair Jesus wouldn't have had to die for you...you'd be burning in hell instead." Yes, I'm all soft and tender with my kids like that. ;^)

Kelly said...

wow Carrie. You are pretty funny with your teens. I will have to remember that one and consider it for next time.

Eileen said...

I think the potato head glasses are simply smashing!

jenfrommaine said...

My favorite "fair" comment "The Fair left town" only because it is easy to remember and short, sweet and to the point. I try not to overuse it though. I can't imagine having 5 to have to try and be "fair" with, Yikes!

Shana said...

I have ONE child. Don't know what I would do with 5!!

Tracy P. said...

My favorite technique is to sneak in the purchase for said child and quietly ask her not to broadcast that she just got a new whatever. I'm such a chicken.