January 08, 2009

Brand New Fear


I have a new and driving issue in the forefront of my mind.  I cannot stop thinking about this today and it's going to give me an ulcer.  Don't worry everyone is in good health, no bad news from T, the mice seem to be dwindling, Obama is getting ready to take office. (Now you know-sorry to my republican friends but I meant that as a good thing).  The thing that has me upset came in an email today.  Our ward's non existent cub scout program has finally combined with another ward that has an active cub scout program and so my 9 year old and I who have been doing 'home-school scouts' now have a group for him to join.  That is also a good thing.  Home school scouts, while being productive had really run it's coarse.  The thing that has rocked my world and stung me deep is that they made the upcoming event announcements via email today.  And this coming March, before T comes back, is.... Que scary music please... The pinewood derby!  Shriek!  Scream!  NO!!!!!!!

Yes, this means I will be going it alone for the derby this year.  And frankly I would rather deal with more mice.  You have to understand our long family history with the derby.  Both Grandfathers had excellent derby skills.  Carving delicate cylindrical works of art with perfect paint jobs that went down in derby history in their wards.  Cars with names like 'the Silver Bullet.'  Cars with invisible inner weighting of melted molten medal.  Or if you are talking about my Dad's brand of weighting, step into the dental office/secret derby production factory.  In this mysterious place we use liquid mercury for the 5oz weigh-in ingredient.  The inner cavity of these cars allowed for enough of the toxic silver liquid to slosh around inside giving the car the added edge it needed to speed ahead from behind to win every (and I mean every) race.  My dad, the DDS, had all the engineers on our block stumped.  Until they read this post that is...  Alas mercury is now a no-no so it's a safe cancerous cat to let out of the bag.  

My husband has all these special tools to make an awesome winning car.  Also we have quite a winning record to live up to.  The pressure!  Maybe he can talk me though how to use them over the phone.  It will be like an operation I have never performed before and D's winning streak will be on the line, but I will have to rise to the occasion.  

The paint job doesn't scare me since we have these great car wraps that make it look all perfect.  Sorry if I have offended you because you are one of those pinewood derby snobs who like to come to the event with a very kid-made car and drop all kinds of comments like "I say let the kids have the experience of making the car- that is what you are supposed to do you know, says so right in the leader's guidebook for nerdy scout rule followers." (really no offense intended)  Well that is just silliness.  They can make their cars when they have kids someday- just like is says in the Down and Derby movie. He can pick the color, and maybe the cut if it's acceptable. 
 

By scout number 3 we have this thing down.  T procrastinates, gets inspired, I am the wind beneath his wings, we act surprised to have such a winning car, take our trophy, exhibit good sportsmanship, and then when we are alone in the car we scream and shout our guts out.  I am afraid there will be no such ritual this year.  Could it be our year to get to the heart of what is important with cub scouting ?  Fun with a purpose?  Do your best?  Do a good turn daily?  Cheat with an old winning car?  (I've known folks to do that).  Call Grandparents to come to my rescue?  All of the above?  I just don't know- so I am going to sleep on it and hope for inspirational dreams.  Wish me luck!

8 comments:

Kristina P. said...

Good luck! I hope your car is WAAAAAYY better than all those other less deserving kids.

Kelly said...

Me too, me too. I only hope I can develope the skills I need.

And how do I ask for help from someone in my ward with the follow up question of "So you can make my son a winning car right? Because if not you are so fired!"

Eileen said...

Oh, Kelly! I'd be scared too. Lyle knows all those dental office pinewood derby tricks. He learned them from his dad, the oral surgeon. Despite all that, Adam's cars always came in second place. Always the bridesmaid, never the bride.

Best of luck to you!!

Kelly said...

Do you and Lyle want to come out for a visit... Oh I don't know, say around the week of March 23rd? Just wondering...

Kelly said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Bob and Julie said...

Ohhhh...definite fetal position!! Funny thing is that Derrick just came to me 20 minutes before I read this post to ask me if I could help him with his car. I said, "Actually no...I have no clue about those things. I didn't even help Nathan at all".

I say you just drill some hole in the block, paint it whitish yellow and call it the "swiss" cheese car. Do the Swiss make fast cars? Well....good luck my friend! I have no doubt you will pull it off with flying colors. You are one of the most amazing women I know!!

Shelly said...

Easy Peasy. I helped with my son's car the last few years and while not perfect, memories of doing his car together will be something he will always remember.
I even made my car and it is so slooowww, but it won for its design.

This year we have 3 cars to do. 1 for a community Pack and 2 for our Ward Pack, though it isn't our ward Pack. We are way too cool for that....

Kelly said...

Easy Peasy Lemon squeezy my eye!