March 08, 2009

Where is this blog going?

Ever since my husband deployed to Iraq last October I have built a closer relationship with my blog.  It has become a place for me to go everyday and write about my feelings.  Good and bad.  A place where I can complete something and feel good about it.  How often does a stay at home mother of 5 get to do that?  Not often enough I am telling ya.  My husband, who is always more safety conscious than I am constantly reminds me that you never know who is lurking on your blog and to be careful what you write.  I am less worried.  I think most people out there are harmless and have good intentions.  I wanted more followers.  I would pick one up here and there and feel really cool.  I even created one for my husband so he could comment thinking that my comments would pick up.  No go.  He reads but feels that if he wants to say something to me about what I wrote, he will just, I don't know- say it.  To my face.  Or in our case these days on the phone when he calls me each day.  He is not into the public display of anything.  So you can imagine how much he loved me posting his love letters on my blog.  Not so much.

One day I lost a follower due to some glitch in the system.  I thought I had offended in some way.  I removed myself from his blog.  (Childish).  He instantly commented that he didn't stop following.  (Whoops).  I added myself back again.  Why is it that we bloggers care so much about our blogs and our followers, and our comments.  Why?  Oh why?  I guess I want validation that I am not a rambling idiot of sorts.  (This post isn't helping).

Then I stumbled on a popular blogger the other day who mentioned that she had only been blogging for 2 months.  Her blog has a huge following and I thought to my self.  Wow- she must be some sort bloggy genius.  I commented and asked her what her secret was.  She admitted to spending a lot of time on it in the beginning and to joining up with groups like blog stalkers.  She also leaves between 20-30 comments a day.  I am seriously not going to do that.  No time!  Also part of me wants followers but only the nice kind.  Better still if I actually know them.  An acquaintance of mine recently had to shut down her blog due to an actual stalker of sorts.  For the safety of her kids she got rid of the blog.  Another friend went private due to similar problems.  You don't always want to be so popular.  

So I have come to terms with my 8 little followers (I personally know all but one).  I am happy to have 3-5 (sometimes zero) comments a day.  The blog is fulfilling it's duty for now.  I will not pursue a large crowd following my blog.  It was something I thought would be cool 2 days ago though, and I totally understand the desire behind it.  I just don't want to get to the point where I feel I have put my kids at risk.  And I just can't devote that kind of time to it like some of the pros.  I will continue reading/lurking though, and enjoying all that bloggy love out there to be had.  And please- if you are not a nice person, go lurk elsewhere.


13 comments:

Melinda said...

I am a faithful reader! I am subscribed to your feed through Google Reader, so every time you post something new I know about it right away. So, even if I don't comment or actually come here, I am a "follower." I really enjoy your writing. Your piece this week on AM rituals was especially wonderful.

Kristina P. said...

I was shocked to see that Bee and Rose has been blogging for only 2 months. My year anniversary is actually tomorrow. I have a lot of readers and comments, but it didn't come overnight. I don't even comment first on blogs anymore, but I probably get 3-4 new readers everyday now. It's hard to keep up, and I comment on A LOT of blogs, but I've enjoyed the relationships I've formed immensely.

YOu have a great little blog here!

Come by on Monday to enter my blirthday giveaway!

Kelly said...

Thanks for the comments friends. I feel so popular.

Bob and Julie said...

Holy cow...that is sooo weird...your post shows that it was entered on March 8...but it's only March 7 here. Must be the time difference...still it's odd looking at it. So, I am a total STALKER on your blog! I haven't been a loyal commenter though..sorry about that. Sometimes I don't even log onto the blog scene for a few days. So, I get a little behind on your posts. But I love reading them. I appreciate your example and your thoughts. They have helped me in many ways. You are a great woman. I think you are doing amazing things with your children and hubby!! Thank you for sharing!!!

Bob and Julie said...

Man, my clock must be way off because it's 11:28 here but for some reason my last comment is showing up as 4:27....hmmmm (well, a little more info than you wanted...but...it's just odd)

A Friendly Reader Only said...

I agree totally with being careful in blogland - Don't need any more than what I can keep up with! I am lucky if I get to update my blog once a week - But I have more time to read others (because I do this at work) I just don't always leave comments. It is nice to know that someone is taking the time to stop by though - So I will say that I will be stopping back by & totally enjoyed your blog!! Love the picture of the sunset!! :}

Dawn Parsons Smith said...

Hi Kelly:) I read your blog every time I see a new post. I am a faithful follower and commenter. I did spend lots of time my first week blogging stalking other blogs because I was just amazed at the quality of writing out there. As I mentioned in my note back to you, after that first week I only spend an hour or so a day working on my blog and commenting. I do this because I enjoy the creative outlet. I also use it as a wonderful resource to help champion causes and for networking.

I hope you weren't offended by me in some way. I shared the blog award with you because I really do think your blog is wonderful. I wanted to send others your way because I wanted them to see how wonderful you are too:)

I hope you don't mind if I continue to follow your blog:) I really do like it here!

Kelly said...

I love your comments Bee! And I love your blog. Your award was a serious honor. I am still thinking of who I can forward it to. I am obviously still on the fence about how public I want my blog to me. But I have blog envy with you serious bloggers. You ROCK! Everyone wants to be loved and feel validated, and you deserve it. Hope I haven't hurt you : )

You can stalk me any time!

Tom said...

Nice post. I have been out of town and without internet for 2 days or I would have commented earlier. I enjoy your blog and promise not to stalk you in a bad way.

Unknown said...
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Jennifer said...

I read your blog every time you post a new one! Sorry for not commenting earlier, we got wrapped in the weekend and this is the first time I have sat down at the computer! I do your feed through google reader, so it tells me every time you post something new. I've totally enjoyed keeping up with you guys this way! So when you see random traffic from Korea you know where it comes from, ironically the first place I knew you! Anyway you are awesome and I enjoy your blog, don't be offended by my sporadic commenting. With three small ones under foot it's hard to find time to even read the blogs I love half the time! It's probably why my comments are so few on my own blog, too!!

Kelly said...

Hey, Just for the record, no one need apologize for reading without commenting. You are all off the hook for that : )

Read or don't, comment or don't. You will all still be my friends. My own sister won't read because she hates computers. We talk on the phone instead.

It does feel good to hear from you all though : )

Natalie Daines said...

I'm probably the only Oxford, UK person on your blog. You'll always know when I stop in to visit you. I love your take on life. It's refreshing and hilarious at the same time!